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We’ve come such a long way in healthcare, especially with respect to diet and exercise, medications and surgery, that I think we can forget that we are still human beings. We aren’t meant to live forever, no matter how hard we may try.
End of life issues are becoming very common as the baby boomer generation ages. We are all living longer and this is a good thing – for the most part.
The part that isn’t so good is that many people have not communicated what measures they want taken to keep themselves alive if anything happens to them. Medicine has come along way, and we can keep your heart beating and your lungs breathing well past the point of you being “alive” in many cases.
How many of you out there have discussed with your family what you would want done if you fall into a coma for any reason? If you have an accident and become “brain dead” would you want to be hooked up to a ventilator? Feeding tube?
Many people know how they feel about these end-of-life issues, but they haven’t written down these express wishes and they haven’t assigned a health care proxy.
I’m writing this to say do it now!
There is no right or wrong answer in this case. There is no judgment being passed if you say “once I’m in a coma just pull the plug” or if you say “ I don’t care if I’m asleep forever just keep me on that ventilator until my time is up.” Deeply personal, philosophical and religious beliefs can come up in these decisions and they are each of our decisions to make!
Unless you don’t assign a health care proxy or write down your wishes. Then the decisions will be left up to whatever family members are around at the time if you are incapable of speaking or making competent decisions for any reason. I don’t think that’s fair to do to your family.
The good news is that you don’t need a lawyer or money to ensure your wishes will be followed even if you can’t speak up for yourself! In most states you just need two witnesses to sign in your presence.
It’s as simple as writing down exactly what your wishes would be in different situations. This is called a “living will” or “advance directive.” If you are unconscious or not in a mental state to make decisions, doctors can refer to this document and follow your wishes.
This is a great website where you can download a copy of your states advance directive and fill it out:
http://www.caringinfo.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=3289
If you prefer, you can just talk with someone and specify what you would and would not want done in different situations. Then they would make sure your wishes are followed if you can’t. This is called a “healthcare proxy” or “healthcare agent” or “durable power of attorney.” This should be someone you trust, someone who can keep calm in a crisis, and someone likely to be around. You should also have a backup in case that person isn’t around for any reason.
In order for anyone to honor your living will or ask your healthcare proxy what steps should be taken, two physicians have to declare you unable to make medical decisions. Also, at any time you can change your mind and rip up any paperwork you’ve done, or change it in any way.
Make copies of any paperwork, give a copy to your regular physician and let your family know where any papers are. Most importantly, talk with your loved ones about your wishes! In any unfortunate event they will at least have comfort knowing that your wishes are being followed.
Let’s face it, something bad can happen at any age regardless of what kind of health you are in. I’ve seen healthy 20 year olds comatose after car accidents, and I’ve seen active 95 year olds on ventilators after a sudden stroke. No matter who you are you won’t have any control at that point, unless you’ve taken the time to assign a healthcare proxy or write out a living will.
Once that’s settled then you can focus on how you LIVE your LIFE NOW, instead of worrying about the end.
